Saturday, May 3, 2008

faithfulness to the unfaithful

     Today I got a LONG awaited call from Focus on the Family saying that I have been accepted to the institute for the Fall Semester!  I applied at the beginning of the spring semester (January-ish) and since I was up to my eye balls in school work, I hadn't had time to really think about it.  As the school year was drawing to a close, the time for applying for housing and registering for new classes had arrived.  I knew that I wouldn't find out if I had gotten accepted until after I had left for the summer, so I had to register for classes and figure out plan B of "my plan" in case it wasn't the Lord's (this is usually the outcome).  I signed up for classes and wasn't too thrilled about them.  Over and over again I asked the Lord that if He didn't want me in Colorado in the fall, that I would not be accepted.  It has been probably one of the biggest desires of my heart right now in this period of waiting.  There are so many unknowns, but the list is getting shorter!  I now know where I will be in the summer (Precept-Tennessee) and I now know where I will be in the Fall (Focus on the Family-Colorado)!  The Lord is so faithful even though I fail so many times.  He has, is, and will always be faithful to me.  He disciplines for my benefit, so that I may share in His holiness (Hebrews 12:10)!  
     The greatest part about this story is that I actually missed my acceptance call from Focus on the Family because I was praying with a friend in the prayer chapel.  One of the things that we were praying about was Focus on the Family.  The past week I was so anxious about getting the call.  It seemed like the call was NEVER going to come!  But while we were praying I told the Lord that I didn't want to go anywhere He didn't want me to go.  Instantly I felt peace.  It is that peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).  Then when we walked back to my cottage I checked my phone and sure enough, they had called!  I wasn't expecting it; I just knew that the Lord was taking care of it.  
     The Lord has definitely been teaching me patience and it is so exciting to see growth in the waiting period.  In James (5:7) it says to wait as a farmer waits.  This is such an awesome concept because a farmer doesn't sit around while he waits for harvest.  He is working and laboring HARD!  He is irrigating, mowing, weeding, spraying, tilling the soil, and pruning.  He is working so hard so that the reward is great.  He is focused on the pursuit.  His mind is focused on how he is going to get to the time of harvest, not harvest itself.  He has so much to do before harvest, so he works; he works hard.  So while God is telling me to wait, he is preparing me and growing me.  I can't desire the end result more than the pursuit because there is such greatness in the pursuit!  If I focus on the end I will miss all that God is trying to teach me now!
     I leave for Choir tour tomorrow.  We leave for two weeks and then I'll be home for a week before I head out to Precept for the summer!  I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for me.  I am so blessed and so unworthy.  He is so faithful even though I can be so unfaithful!  

Lord, may my focus always be on you.  May I never worry because you are my hope, my refuge, and my strength. 

3 comments:

Liz said...

i will miss you SO much when you are gone but i hope you have a marvelously blessed time out there! both in tennessee this summer and in colorado in the fall! i can't wait til i get to see you again and hear ALL about it!

CONGRATULATIONS!

Bryce said...

It has been so cool to see you waiting upon the Lord and hoping in Him and now His faithfulness and His giving you the desires of your heart. The Lord is abounding in love and His goodness is amazing! May we never doubt and may we always be content because He is enough!

Dani said...

I love reading your posts! They always have something to challenge and encourage! Congrats on the internship!