fog and a solution

So, it is a foggy day here in Riverside, CA where you can never guess what the weather is going to be like:)  Sunday it rained and yesterday we hit the 80s!  I guess it keeps us on our toes.  I love the fog though.  It reminds me of home.  I miss home and my family and our randomness!  Honestly, I don't think I've met a more random family than mine and a few of my close friends can testify to that!

Anyways, I received a comment on how we get the point across, to the younger people in our lives, that they are to find their identity in Christ and not in a 'significant other'.  I think that this is one of the toughest things to accomplish.  I know that when I was in high school it was tough.  I never dated in High School, but everyone around me 'dated'(I use that term loosely).  Although, it is a tough thing to teach, I think it is VITAL to raising up a generation that is living a life zealous for the Lord.

I honestly believe that they have to be completely satisfied in Him.  They only way to truly understand who God is and fall in love with Him is through His Word.  I don't think that jr. highers and high schoolers have this foundation.  The Word of God is transforming, and life changing!  It is SO vital to how we live our lives and we live our lives based on who we understand God(our Savior, Redeemer, and Lord) to be. 

What also contributes to this is a lack of fear in God.  Sometimes we get caught up in the fact that He is a loving God(without a shadow of a doubt He is), and forget that He is a God that is Holy and should be approached in that manner!  He requires holiness from us.  We truly need a fear of the Lord and to fall in Love with Him....through the study of His Word.  We need to regard scripture as precious...we need to ingrain this in them.  

Deuteronomy 6:6-9 says,

"These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.  You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.  You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."

This is how we help build their foundation in the Lord, so that when they get to the point of dating and truly seeking the one that the Lord has for them, to glorify Him in marriage, that they are only content in the Lord and only dependent on Him.

I know that Jr. High was not an enjoyable time in many people's lives.  And I praise God for those who work with them(such as Rachel).  But I think that because it is an awkward transition in life, it is imperative to teach them the precepts of the Lord.  I don't think we give God's Word the credit it deserves.  I think that since we see them as Jr. Highers(the stereotype of crazy/out of control), we think that we have to dress up Christianity and God's Word.  NO...it is LIFE CHANGING!  My life especially is a testimony to that.  So, at the end of the day, what are you doing to help raise up a generation after you that is seeking Him and wanting to abide in Christ?

thoughts on dating, marriage, and the opposite sex...ok a lot of thoughts!

So, I know I've already posted one blog about loveish, but I have a lot of theories about dating and the such.  I do not want to give off the impression that I know everything...lets just say I know what NOT to do.  

We have had women's and men's chapel this last week, and I never really like them.  They are SO cliche, for the girls anyways.  I think it is ALWAYS about the Proverbs 31 woman, as if we don't have anything else that applies to us!  This is what goes on:

1. dress modestly

2. this is how you know if he is a godly man or not

Those are the 2 subjects they talk about.  THATS IT!!  Nothing about how we are to pursue God with our whole hearts, or trusting Him with everything and being wrapped up in the Lord.  We just know if the 'man' we are currently dating this week is a God-centered man or not(and he usually isn't...but we still don't break up with him...cause he WILL change).  But honestly, I'm tired of the bar being lowered, for us girls.  When I get out of those chapels, I feel like I have NO purpose.  I feel that what they are telling us is something I've been told since I was in Jr. High(and I don't like to really remember my jr. higher days).  

Last weeks women's chapel was different.  It was better, but I still think it could have used a little improvement.  I do think that modesty is key.  We cannot ignore the fact that every supermarket has pornography on the cover of magazines in the checkout lines.  As sisters in Christ to our Brothers in Christ, we need to make ever effort to promote modesty and help them in any way possible.  I remember my dad teaching my brother about these immodest(and dangerous) women.  He would call them 'sharks'.  And that was their secret code. 

And yes, the other aspect is important as well: how to spot a God-centered man.  I do agree that my choices in the past have not been for the God-centered man(although, that is what I want more than ever now).  I would justify and force him into the pattern, but I was lying to myself.  BUT, I do think that we sit in those chapels and think of the 'possible one' and do a check on him and if he is meeting all of the standards that they present us with.  In the end...we lie to ourselves.  Or, we think that he is trying to become this man...when essentially, he has no intention of changing.  

This problem stems from us, as women/girls of the Lord do not have a firm foundation of who we are in Christ.  How are Godly women supposed to act?  Are we supposed to be like the women we see on TV who throw themselves on every guy that gives them a smile?  Or who can make them laugh?  NO, our identity is not found in the man.  It is found in Christ!  

I do understand that a lot of girls do not have Godly women surrounding them, pointing them to the Lord, but this is why this generation has to stand up and teach the younger ones how to act as a woman who is zealous for the Lord.

We have to be content in the Lord before we ever get into a relationship.  I am so guilty of not doing this, and that is why my relationships in the past have failed.  The reason for marriage is to glorify the Lord.  That is the sole purpose.  The joy we receive from it is an aspect that the Lord has interwoven into marriage, but He created it to glorify Himself.  And it is glorifying to Him the most, when we are most satisfied in Him(John Piper).  

There are some great Godly men out there, but not the first one we see is the one who we should marry...and that is why I think the 'ring by spring' motto is so heavy in the Christian Colleges.  We finally meet someone who loves the Lord, but that doesn't mean, as girls we jump at the first chance we get.  We get involved with someone so quickly, without seeing their character.  Is he mature?  Is he willing to serve?  Is he whole-heartedly committed to the Lord(this one we can say a quick yes to, but have you seen that in him?)  What do other people say about him?  How do you see his character in the way he lives his life?  Does he have direction?  Will he be a good father?  

We need to raise the bar on our expectations of the men around us.  Not only as possible future husbands, but as Godly Christian men.  We need our men in America(and around the world) to stand up for the truth.  They can't be cowards...we don't need any more cowards.  I have met some great guys here at CBU who are seeking the Lord whole-heartedly.  They have encouraged me and pushed me as a Christian.  Thats who I want to be surrounded by.  I want Godly Christian Guy-friends who treat me(as a friend) with respect and honor, because ultimately how they act with me(as a friend) will help prepare them for how they will honor their wives.  

I was reading in Ephesians the other day and discussing submission with a few of my guy friends.   First of all, let me say that submission is an amazing thing and is one of the greatest commands we have as women.  We were talking about how submission is supposed to look like in a dating relationship and what the role of the guy was to lead in that submission.  First, we are supposed to submit to each other in Christ as Christians(without the dating context) and secondly I think a lot of the time we get 'submission' and 'servanthood' mixed up.  One of my friends told a story of the wife doing dishes in the kitchen and the husband is sitting on the couch telling her that he would die for her.  She then exclaims, "I don't need you to die for me, I need you to do the dishes!"  I think this is such a perfect example of this misconception.  The man is to love the wife as much as the wife is to submit.  Submission is an act of letting the leader lead.  Supporting him in that decision and following after him.  This is what the man is to do.  I think submission is hard for a lot of women because the husband doesn't love her the way she is supposed to be loved(which stems from my whole point of the girls not raising the bar of how men are to act toward them while we are younger) and then the wife just takes over.  The man becomes dependent on her taking care of everything.  Submission is such a great thing and I think that we, as women, miss the importance and the gift of submission.  We don't have to worry about leading a family.  I want so much for my husband to be the leader and for me to help him and support his leadership to show an example to our children.  

My last point I want to cover is in Ephesians 5:25-26.  Please bear with me:)

The text says: 

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless." 

The husband is to love their wives JUST AS Christ's love for the church SO THAT He might sanctify her, and present her to Himself without blemish.  So, although only Christ can make clean and present her blameless unto God, the man is supposed to love in this sanctifying manner(which means to dedicate to God).  He is to keep her heart completely the Lords.  She is not the man's, she is God's.  She has such great purpose as a woman of the Lord.  So WHY on earth do we think we need to find that Godly man NOW!  As College students, we need to be thinking what can I do for the Lord right now, while I'm single.  Because, although you can do a lot for the Lord in a marriage context with another person, there are things you can do for the Lord, being single, that you cannot do in when you are married.  

Let us live for the Lord whole-heartedly, without depending on a relationship with another person, but let our only focus be pleasing the Lord and reflecting His Character.  The Lord has great plans for us NOW!  It would be detrimental to miss the things He has for us, and what He wants to teach us.  

the reason/thoughts on Valentines

So, I've never understood these blog things, until this year.  Only the smart intellectual types had them and so I never really looked into them.  Then I came to Cal Baptist and everyone is all about the blogs!  My friend Rachel has been nagging me to get one of these for about 2 months now, and so I’ve decided to give in.  The biggest reason why I decided to get one, is because I am interning at Precept Ministries in Tennessee this summer and this is the easiest to keep everyone updated.  So, I'm excited about this blog.  

I do have one theory about Valentines day though that I would like to talk about.  I actually told Rachel about this theory and then she told me that I had to get a blog(again)...so here is the theory that has made it's way from my head to here:)

So Valentines Day...it's a day for the purpose of expressing your love and appreciation for those who you care about the most.  Valentines has such great potential, but every year it seems to get more and more unoriginal.  Girls are awaiting the great bouquet of flowers on their doorstep and guys are frantically calling every flower shop in town.  I don't really understand the concept of flowers.  They are really beautiful, but what do you do with them??   (Now, if you received flowers from your admirer or father or grandfather or whoever, please don't be offended)  

This Valentines, I was thinking of my mom.  A few mother's days ago, all she wanted to do was have all of us pack up the back of the truck and go to the dump!  I thought she was crazy, but now I see such wisdom in this gift we gave my mom.  My mom is really practical and I see how wise it is to be practical.  I don't ever remember my dad giving my mom flowers.  She always asks for things like spatulas!  

Now, think about it.  First, Valentines is to be showing appreciation.  If someone gives you a gift, but there is no feeling behind it(or maybe it is a gift that is falsifying their feelings-maybe they really aren't happy with you).  Would you really want a gift like that?  So, when guys are running to and fro across the country looking for what EVERY guy is getting for his admired one, how does that have any thought behind it?  Now, there ARE exceptions to this.  Maybe she REALLY loves flowers...then why not get her a flower that will last a bit longer...like a potted plant!  That is SUPER practical.  Hey, I might even want that.  But when you just buy flowers, they die the next day!  If someone gave me flowers, I honestly wouldn't know what to do with them.  

That day, the light bulb in our bathroom had gone out(it actually had burnt out a week), and we had been waiting for campus maintenance to come and fix it.  We had been going to the bathroom in the dark for a week.  My roommate and I would always pray for each other at night when we had to take a shower in the pitch black.  Anyways, a friend came over that day and bought us a light bulb and fixed it for us.  Seriously, that was one of the greatest presents ever!  

One of my other friends told me that he was getting cards for his sisters.  This is a wonderful example of what Valentines is supposed to look like!  Its not just for the girlfriend you just hooked up with two weeks ago.  And as Christians, this is such a great day to send a special note of encouragement, letting the Body know that you love them and are grateful for them.

All that to say, Valentines has great potential.  I just wish people made the most of it.